culture shock or not?

Assalammualaikum and hey!
lama gila i didnt update my blog hehehe sorry. was busy with college life hence i had no time to update anything in my blog. mishhhyouuuumuchooooo<3

y'know the weird thing is when people in my surrounding were wondering whether i had to deal with culture shock or not since obviously in college life there will be guys. unlike the schools(primary and secondary) which i went before, basically all are girls so macam weh, kau akan bercampur pasni. tak cuak ke? tak kekok ke? omg .

okay la. to think of it, memang normal la for me to feel scared of it. talking to guys will be a part of my life dah. no more jual mahal taknak bagi no fon etc since there are more than 10 groups which definitely will be created in whatsapp so that it would be easier for everyone to contact each other *sigh

actually i dont mind. altho i barely come out from my house since iam the type of person who loves to stay in my comfort zone if theres nothing good that i can do at outside. for me, as long as you can take care of yourself, know the limit in girl-boy relationship then insha Allah everything will be alright. just, have faith in Allah. so i dont really think of what if guy do this to me, what if guy tackles me, what if bla bla bla. i have the feeling that those things wont happen if you are strict to yourself, literally. means, you dont "layan" them. you act like you are a warrior rather than a princess. y'know what i mean?(say it with british accent pls haha)

guys wont have the urge to tackle you when you show them your dark side because they will think then you are such a boring person. your sense of humor sucks a lot and the only think you know is to get angry haha. in my opinion la btw. so, back to my topic, iam okay with the fact that i have no choice but to socialize with guys almost everyday.

the thing that matters the most is having guys as your classmates like OMG CAN YOU GUYS VANISH FROM MY SIGHT?!

knowing me, all of the human beings in this world wont get shock when you see me sitting like a gangster on a chair, sometimes shifting to more that one places at a time, combining 2 or 3 chairs together then sleep,eating in  class, talking like a boss etc. i mean i act like i own the class. BUT NOW, I CANT DO THOSE STUFFS BECAUSE GUYS ARE IN THE CLASS TOO! for the first few months i could still control myself. i acted normal. i sat like how the girls usually do, by crossing one of their legs over another, talked softly(pfft), to even list them makes me feel like i wanna puke. geli tahu tak?! until one day some of my true colours had revealed. the dark side of me of course. so i told myself why not i be me je kan? kenapa nak act feminine when the truth is iam far from the word feminine. hence, i started to sit like a gangster, bla bla.

i realised one thing. i must always be me regardless of where i go. tak kisah la the place has so many guys instead of girls or vice versa. i dont care. i still need to show the real me. i want people to know me, not the fake me. if you know what i mean la. because i live in this world to please Allah, not guys. why would i wanna win over their heart when Allah doesnt like it? who are they to my life? do they give me food? money? hell no! so why must i please them?! ha over pulak kan. sebab geram la waktu first few months i controlled myself sedangkan tak payah pun. as long as my true colours arent bad enough then okay je nak revealkan. pfft,

so yeah, frankly, i didnt deal with culture shock. i was absolutely fine with the culture in kms. cuma, i miss home because this is my first time being separated with mommy ayah. tu je.okay la. panjang pulak. adios!

my classmates, #foreverandalways132


pizza kinda night lel


assalammualaikum :)

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